My 19-year-old niece has been living with me since late September. Her parents did the "tough love" thing with her when she was living in Trenton, Missouri. She was living in a total "shit hole" with holes in the roof, a toilet that you couldn't do a #2 in, and the people she lived with had pets that they let shit and pee all over the house. It was disgusting. She lost her job. She was working at a long term care center as a CNA and was working toward getting her certification there. She got sick and missed more than 8 hours of class and was dropped from the CNA class. Because she was dropped from the class, she lost her job. So, this 18-year-old girl is living in an city that she is unfamilar with, without a job, and her parents decided "tough love" was what they needed to do.
She is in CNA class now, which I paid for, not mom and dad, and she finishes her last clinical this weekend. All I want for her is to get a job, maintain that job, stay with us until she can save enough money to get her own place and have some money in a bank account. Six months ago, I thought she might live with us a year or so, but I think I may have really underestimated that time frame. My daughters are sharing a room (and a bed) so that my niece could have her own room. Now, my oldest daughter just wants her own room back.
I can't blame her!
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Young, Married, No Children
So, I am at work talking with another employee about fixing the car and now having the tree branch fall on our other car. He is young, no children, married, and does not own a home (he rents). He asks, "Don't you have an emergency fund?" I had to laugh........
My response, "Just wait until you have children, and own your own home. I will talk to you in 10 years and I will see how much you have in your emergency fund."
Remember those days, when you could save money and had no responsibilities to suck every penny out of you?
My response, "Just wait until you have children, and own your own home. I will talk to you in 10 years and I will see how much you have in your emergency fund."
Remember those days, when you could save money and had no responsibilities to suck every penny out of you?
Storms this Past Weekend
Why when things are going well and I am starting to feel good about our financial position do things always go bad and then I have to play the catch up game for the next several months? The engine went out in my husbands car, needed a new radiator, water pump, all new hoses, etc. $4,000 later, he has practically a new car, but we took a hit financially trying to get his car back on the road. But, it was better than having a payment on a new car. Then some storms roll through the area and late Sunday afternoon a branch fell out of our tree on to the back of my car.
The Baby of the Family
I have 2 daughters. My oldest is 11-years-old and my youngest is 9-years-old. They are so similar in so many ways but so different in one very annoying way. My oldest is very responsible. She sets her own alarm, gets herself up for school, does what she needs to do to get ready, and walks out the door when her ride arrives, sometimes without us even knowing it. My youngest, is so reliant on everyone else for help. When she does set her own alarm, she shuts it off when it goes off and continues to sleep. Her bus comes at 8:15 am and sometimes she will not get out of bed until 8:00 am when her father wakes her up. Then she needs him to help her, get her clothes out, help her brush her hair, make sure she brushes her teeth, etc. I am thankful everyday that I go in to work at 6:30 am so I do not have to deal with it.
I don't know if it is just that she is not a morning person, or that she is just lazy. I sure hope she grows out of this stage because it SUCKS!
I don't know if it is just that she is not a morning person, or that she is just lazy. I sure hope she grows out of this stage because it SUCKS!
Sunday, April 8, 2012
The Best Pet Ever
I have never owned a cat....I have two dogs now, but we have had fish and turtles as well. But the best pet ever is a snake. We have had 3 snakes now and I think we will always have a pet snake!
They do not bark, they do not go outside for hours and then come inside and piss on the floor, and they do not need to be fed daily. We have had two ball pythons and one burmese python. The burmese python just got too big and was too aggressive for us. He was given to us from a friend who was moving and he was supposed to come pick him up when he got settled. But not all Burmese pythons are like that, some are very easy to handle. This one just did not get handled enough to get used to human contact.
Our snake does not eat when the weather is cold. So we do not need to worry about feeding him from October until usually the end of March. During the spring and summer and early fall, we give our snake one rat per week. Within a few days of him eating he poops and then he sheds about once every few weeks when he is eating. Snakes are very low maintenance and often provide entertainment for neighbohood children. We have many kids who stop by and ask when we are going to feed our snake. They know that during the summer we usually do it late Sunday afternoons. My daughters have friends who ask us to let them know so they can come and watch him eat.
It is one thing to see a snake eat something on television, but when you see it with your own two eyes, it is an amazing process. We can take the snake out of his tank and let him slither around our neck and shoulders. He loves the body heat we produce and will snuggle into your clothing to stay warm.
If anyone is looking for a low cost, low maintenance, entertaining pet, try getting a snake. I recommend the ball python. They typically only grow to about 5 feet long!
They do not bark, they do not go outside for hours and then come inside and piss on the floor, and they do not need to be fed daily. We have had two ball pythons and one burmese python. The burmese python just got too big and was too aggressive for us. He was given to us from a friend who was moving and he was supposed to come pick him up when he got settled. But not all Burmese pythons are like that, some are very easy to handle. This one just did not get handled enough to get used to human contact.
Our snake does not eat when the weather is cold. So we do not need to worry about feeding him from October until usually the end of March. During the spring and summer and early fall, we give our snake one rat per week. Within a few days of him eating he poops and then he sheds about once every few weeks when he is eating. Snakes are very low maintenance and often provide entertainment for neighbohood children. We have many kids who stop by and ask when we are going to feed our snake. They know that during the summer we usually do it late Sunday afternoons. My daughters have friends who ask us to let them know so they can come and watch him eat.
It is one thing to see a snake eat something on television, but when you see it with your own two eyes, it is an amazing process. We can take the snake out of his tank and let him slither around our neck and shoulders. He loves the body heat we produce and will snuggle into your clothing to stay warm.
If anyone is looking for a low cost, low maintenance, entertaining pet, try getting a snake. I recommend the ball python. They typically only grow to about 5 feet long!
Gate Fees Piss Me Off
So, we pay about $1000/year just so our kids can play softball. That doesn't include the travel expenses to and from out of town tournaments, hotels, gas, etc. Then the coach have to pay between $250-$500 per tournament entry fee. We show up at the ballpark to watch our children play softball and there are people standing at the entrance collecting gate fees, usually $5 person/day. So, in order for my husband and I to watch our children play softball, who may be playing at different ballparks at different tournaments, we could potentially pay $60/weekend, just to watch. Is that insane or what?
What I want to know is where is all this money going. I wouldn't be so upset about paying gate fees if the parks chalked and filled holes in the field between games. Or maybe put some netting over the bleachers to protect spectators from being hit by foul balls from other fields. Or, perhaps on a very hot and dry day, when the dirt is blowing all over the place, maybe put a bit of water on the field to control the dirt from blowing. Or perhaps, think about the kids for once and put some water jugs in the dugouts. I hate to ask anyone to come watch out kids play because these are youth sports and I don't understand why after all the money we put into the sport, we still have to pay to get through the gate to watch our children play.
It just goes to show that it ISN'T about the kids, it is about the DOLLAR!
What I want to know is where is all this money going. I wouldn't be so upset about paying gate fees if the parks chalked and filled holes in the field between games. Or maybe put some netting over the bleachers to protect spectators from being hit by foul balls from other fields. Or, perhaps on a very hot and dry day, when the dirt is blowing all over the place, maybe put a bit of water on the field to control the dirt from blowing. Or perhaps, think about the kids for once and put some water jugs in the dugouts. I hate to ask anyone to come watch out kids play because these are youth sports and I don't understand why after all the money we put into the sport, we still have to pay to get through the gate to watch our children play.
It just goes to show that it ISN'T about the kids, it is about the DOLLAR!
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
One Last Thought...
There are many other coaches out there who very upset with my daughter's coach because he is having his team play up a division. They are 11U. For those of you who do not know softball, the divisions are 8U, 10U, 12U, 14U, 16U, and 18U. Girls can play 2 years in each division. Within each age division, there are 3 levels, A, B, and C (A being the highest, C being the level just above recreational ball). My 11-year-old is playing her first year in 12U. However, they are a very good team and do not find much competition in the 12U division. Therefore, he is registering them for a lot of 14B and 14A tournaments. They are doing well in the 14U division and getting better by playing up.
Here is the problem....there are some good 12U teams out there, but when we enter a 12A tournament there are often 12B teams that sign up and they do not give us any competition. And when you are paying $400/tournament you want to play some quality games. My daughter's coach feels that playing up is where we need to be. I totally agree with him, as do the other parents. However, there are lots of 14U coaches who do not like to get beat by a bunch of 11-year-old girls. We are beating teams of 8th and 9th graders when our girls are 5th and 6th graders. I am sure it is humiliating for some of these older teams to lose, but playing down and killing teams isn't doing us or them any good either. Our philosophy is that we would rather play up and possibly get beat by older teams, than play down and not learn anything.
What are your thoughts?
Here is the problem....there are some good 12U teams out there, but when we enter a 12A tournament there are often 12B teams that sign up and they do not give us any competition. And when you are paying $400/tournament you want to play some quality games. My daughter's coach feels that playing up is where we need to be. I totally agree with him, as do the other parents. However, there are lots of 14U coaches who do not like to get beat by a bunch of 11-year-old girls. We are beating teams of 8th and 9th graders when our girls are 5th and 6th graders. I am sure it is humiliating for some of these older teams to lose, but playing down and killing teams isn't doing us or them any good either. Our philosophy is that we would rather play up and possibly get beat by older teams, than play down and not learn anything.
What are your thoughts?
And The Results Are In...
The weekend went well....
Jordan, my oldest, is 11 and her team (all 11-year-olds) played in a 14U tournament. Pool play started out slow. We lost 3 of our 4 pool play games. But, what you need to realize is that pool play really means nothing, it is all about the bracket play. Doing well in pool just gets you seeded better when you start bracket play. None of the games we lost were by more than 2 runs. They were all very close games and in all but one game we lost we were ahead until the last inning. Her team only has 2 pitchers, my daughter and another girl who spent the day throwing up. Needless to say, my daughter had to pitch all the games on Saturday. The girls made it past their first bracket game with ease (11-1). But our next game was against the #1 seeded team for the tournament. We had to play a team that we lost to in pool play. They were a very good team from Iowa called I-Club. My daughter's team won by 1 run in the bottom of the last inning. This team was all 14 and 15-year-old girls. It was nice sending them back to Iowa so early in the day! So they have now won their 2nd bracket game which put them into the championship game. A bunch of 11-year-old girls playing in the championship game of a 14U tournament is quite an accomplishment. This time they were playing a team from Nebraska. We got down early but came back and ended up going ahead by 1 run, with less than 10 minutes left. However, they were at the meat of their line up and scored 2 runs to move ahead of us 4-3. Time expired and we lost. But the girls gave it their all and played very well all weekend. They took 2nd place!
Jersey, my 9-year-old, is playing her 1st year of competitive ball. They played in a 10 open tournment and they were the only 1st year team in this 10U tourment. They won 3 of their 4 pool games and played very well. However, they did not fare so well in bracket play and were knocked out after their first bracket game. My daughter pitched 2 games and she won both of her games. They are a very young team and still learning but they are well on their way to becoming a very good team.
All the girls in the tournament deserve kudos for playing so many games this weekend in the heat that we had. If the temps this weekend are any indication of how the late summer is going to be, then we are all in for a very long, and hot summer, yeah!!!! I don't think anyone was prepared for the heat we encountered this weekend. I stopped at several places to find sun block and they did not have any in stock yet.
Jordan, my oldest, is 11 and her team (all 11-year-olds) played in a 14U tournament. Pool play started out slow. We lost 3 of our 4 pool play games. But, what you need to realize is that pool play really means nothing, it is all about the bracket play. Doing well in pool just gets you seeded better when you start bracket play. None of the games we lost were by more than 2 runs. They were all very close games and in all but one game we lost we were ahead until the last inning. Her team only has 2 pitchers, my daughter and another girl who spent the day throwing up. Needless to say, my daughter had to pitch all the games on Saturday. The girls made it past their first bracket game with ease (11-1). But our next game was against the #1 seeded team for the tournament. We had to play a team that we lost to in pool play. They were a very good team from Iowa called I-Club. My daughter's team won by 1 run in the bottom of the last inning. This team was all 14 and 15-year-old girls. It was nice sending them back to Iowa so early in the day! So they have now won their 2nd bracket game which put them into the championship game. A bunch of 11-year-old girls playing in the championship game of a 14U tournament is quite an accomplishment. This time they were playing a team from Nebraska. We got down early but came back and ended up going ahead by 1 run, with less than 10 minutes left. However, they were at the meat of their line up and scored 2 runs to move ahead of us 4-3. Time expired and we lost. But the girls gave it their all and played very well all weekend. They took 2nd place!
Jersey, my 9-year-old, is playing her 1st year of competitive ball. They played in a 10 open tournment and they were the only 1st year team in this 10U tourment. They won 3 of their 4 pool games and played very well. However, they did not fare so well in bracket play and were knocked out after their first bracket game. My daughter pitched 2 games and she won both of her games. They are a very young team and still learning but they are well on their way to becoming a very good team.
All the girls in the tournament deserve kudos for playing so many games this weekend in the heat that we had. If the temps this weekend are any indication of how the late summer is going to be, then we are all in for a very long, and hot summer, yeah!!!! I don't think anyone was prepared for the heat we encountered this weekend. I stopped at several places to find sun block and they did not have any in stock yet.
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Tournament Time Again
This is my favorite time of year. From the first of March until the end of September my kids are in tournaments every weekend. There is nothing like packing a cooler and hanging at the ball park all weekend. Of course, I always pack several adult beverages as well. They have 3 games each on Saturday, which means we will be at the ball park all day. Sunday always seems to be the longest day, because they could each potentially play up to 6 games. Many people ask how (and why) I would do that, but by the end of the summer they realize it was worth it!
It's all about the farmer's tan.
It's all about the farmer's tan.
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Here's the way it really is....
My kids have definitely said on more than one occasion that they want to quit. But this is usually when they are having to miss a sleepover or birthday party because of a tournament, or when it is 100 degrees outside and they have to practice. But when they get to practice or a tournament, they seem to forget that just 30 minutes prior they were upset becuase they had to go.
I don't think I am pushing them to hard, I am just trying to fill their time with something besides sitting on the couch eating bon-bons...
I am not pushing them to do anything they are not capable of doing. They are smart kids, and any grade lower than an A is due to laziness and not turning in an assignment. They both tested out as exceptional, so my expectations are high for them academically, as there is no reason they should not get straight A's in elementary and junior high school.
Softball is their chosen extracurricular activity and they are very good at this as well. I am not looking for them to go play professionally anywhere. I just want them to not have to pay for college. Whether this is academically or athletically, their skills are just a tool they can use for free education, no more, no less!
But what it really comes down to is that I see entirely too many children, who do nothing but sit around and watch television or play video games. Our youth are becoming very lazy (and obese) and I do not want that lifestyle for my children.
So I will keep pushing them and continue to be their external motivator!
I don't think I am pushing them to hard, I am just trying to fill their time with something besides sitting on the couch eating bon-bons...
I am not pushing them to do anything they are not capable of doing. They are smart kids, and any grade lower than an A is due to laziness and not turning in an assignment. They both tested out as exceptional, so my expectations are high for them academically, as there is no reason they should not get straight A's in elementary and junior high school.
Softball is their chosen extracurricular activity and they are very good at this as well. I am not looking for them to go play professionally anywhere. I just want them to not have to pay for college. Whether this is academically or athletically, their skills are just a tool they can use for free education, no more, no less!
But what it really comes down to is that I see entirely too many children, who do nothing but sit around and watch television or play video games. Our youth are becoming very lazy (and obese) and I do not want that lifestyle for my children.
So I will keep pushing them and continue to be their external motivator!
Friday, March 23, 2012
Is Competition Good
I grew up in the competitive sports world and played nearly every sport imaginable. I played ice hockey, softball, golf, volleyball, track and field, basketball, bowling, and anything that offered competition. My father always pushed us to be the best, do our best, and we would be rewarded for our hard work. I maintain straight A's through school and when it I needed it to count, it did, I recieved a full athletic scholarship for college. My brother, who was an awesome baseball player, also received full athletic scholarship. I have sister, though not the athlete my brother and I were, was very book smart, and I can remember her staying up until the wee hours of the night to finish her homework. She is a bit OCD as well, so it had to be done with perfection. To this day, I am a very competitive adult and hate to lose. That is my nature and I am okay with that. However, I have two daughters and I am pushing them as my father did me. Is this bad? I don't think so!
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